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Story 1# (Back in Foundation)

by - Wednesday, November 11, 2015


My name is Peggy Smith from the small run-down cottage at the far corner of Gulder, Fairy-tale Land. I’m going to turn 18 next summer and I’m proud of it too because it means people will start respecting me as a grown-up rather than a scrawny farm girl churning butter in the parlor all day and every day. 

I know for a fact that the humans are unnecessarily excited when they meet someone like me who is a citizen of Fairy-tale Land but I am always afraid to disappoint them with what I have to say about it. In my utmost personal opinion, which would get me grounded for life if my parents ever get a whiff of this “nonsense” sprouting out of my mouth, I think that living here isn’t as fun as everyone wants the humans to think. In fact, since the day I came into existence in this vast, mystical kingdom, I have found it just about as boring as sitting and watching an irritated horse flickering at a swarm of flies with its tail. They’re just the government’s tactics of luring awed tourists from the Mainland to visit us and make money for them.

Yes, yes, I admit living in Fairy-tale Land, which maybe for some humans is as good as Hollywood, the melting pot of different cultures, languages and creatures can be quite overwhelming at first. However, when I have to meet with the same people or individuals all my life, watching the same marriage between the same prince and princess again and again, or having to rebuild my house for the hundredth time against an “earthquake” as Jack chops down the beanstalk and the giant fell, it’s downright depressing if not traumatizing. I mean, where is the creativity and fun of it all? 

And the worst part about this whole thing is that I will never get my happily ever after, neither of us ordinary people who aren’t part of a story will. As long as we are not mentioned in a story, even just by a name or a hazy description at the corner of a book, nothing good will happen to us. Nobody cares and certainly nobody sympathies us. We have to strive hard to get that happiness.

It was the day before one of those horrid, shiny and glittery royal weddings again. If I’m not mistaken, it was for the celebration of Rapunzel’s wedding to the prince and everyone who even cares were decorating the roads with white and golden ribbons for the happy wedding. It will be held at night and all are invited. Now usually, I won’t hesitate to come over and play my part as the happy-go-lucky citizen and endure the unbearable hours with these blessed people, but something struck the lunacy side of my mind and I realized that I had had enough. 

As I got dressed that morning, a devious plan was forming in my head. After performing my usual duties around the farm, I sat down on the hay scattered floor of the barn and began writing letters and posted them. I waited anxiously for night to come.

In the flickering light of the candles, it illuminated the faces of a dozen of people and creatures from all over the kingdom. There was Captain Hook with his devilish sneer and richly adorned red coat. 
“Peter Pan isn’t here, is he? He got my arm!”

There was also good old Rumpelstiltskin with the usual beer at hand. 
“I may be short but I dare you to step on me!”

 Out of the crowd of chattering people, Wolf sat quietly in the corner sobbing with his huge head in his paws. There was the Witch from her delightful little house of gingerbread, the pied piper, the Giant from the Lands of the Clouds who I had to force him to sit outside and others sitting around the little fire in the center of the room. These are the faces of innocent people who were once oppressed by those who were determined to get their happily ever after and will do it again when the time comes. 

Take Wolf for example. Little Red Riding Hood, that imp under an angel’s halo ruined his beautiful garden again on her way to her grandmother’s house and threatened him with a gun. A gun! He tried to advise her through her grandmother but in a blink of an eye, he got his tail chopped off by an anonymous hunter, I presumed he was Little Red’s boyfriend and threw him into a well!

With this enthusiasm burning into my veins, I lifted the spirits of my forlorn comrades.

“Come, friends! Follow my great plan and seek the justice for the mistreatment we all had. We are either humiliated in both worlds or completely overlooked at. It is time we write ourselves into society and gain what is ours!”

 They cheered in support. That night too, we rode out onto our horses to fulfill the plan.

 In the heart of the woodlands where Snow White’s glass coffin lay, Snow White was busy messaging on her phone and drinking soda that she didn’t even noticed us.

“Um, hey Sleeping Beauty? If you’re like, awake can we have a sleepover tonight? Like, Mr. Dreamy is nowhere to be seen. I think he hates me or something. Wait, what? I can’t hear you, some losers are knocking on the glass. Hey, quit knocking!” shouted Snow White while sticking her tongue out.

“Wait, get your hands off me! Do you have, like, any idea who you’re dealing with? I’m the most beautiful woman in the kingdom. Did you even moisturize your hands? Here take this, it really helps.”

We tied her up along with the rest of the seven dwarves in their home and placed one of the stepsisters in the coffin for the prince to come and kiss her. In the far north of the land, I had posted Ursula to imprison Ariel the little mermaid before she handed the poor Prince Eric a love potion that will ruin his life forever.

“No! You can’t lock me up. I’ll talk to my father about this and you shall bear the consequences! But whatever. I call dibs because that prince is mine, mine, mine! What do you mean I’m being possessive?!” cried Ariel furiously from behind the bars.

At the dainty steps of the castle entrance, Rumpelstiltskin stole the purposely thrown glass slipper before Prince Charming sees it. I sincerely hoped he won’t ever have to marry Cindy who sings to animals and sew clothes for the rats infested in her home

 “Ooh, what a pretty little shoe this is. Could cost me a fortune!” chuckled Rumpelstiltskin heartily. He took out bottle of beer, emptied it and threw it to an innocent passer-by. “Whoops, sorry mate! Ugh, Cindy sure needs to keep her rats off her shoes more often. This is nasty!” he sighed and kept it in his pocket.

What we did that night was solely to correct what is wrong and give everyone the justice and happiness they deserve. The Kingdom of Fairy-tale Land turned upside down over the night.
           
           Despite the exhausting chaos we did, there was still one thing left that we haven’t dealt with. Rapunzel’s wedding was still on even though just a day earlier, she had thrown her kind foster mother from the windowsill of the tower in their home to marry her prince. The golden bells were ringing and the radiant couple were making their way down the steps to receive congratulations from their people.
        
        “Oh, thank you for the flowers, darling. They’re beautiful!” said Rapunzel and sends her dazzling smile to the small child. As she walked pass the crowd, she looked at her husband and said in a hushed whisper.

            “Honey! Psst! Honey! You don’t happen to have a sanitizer, do you? I could have died at any moment with these pheasants throwing themselves at me. Blurgh!” she said acidly and frantically rubbed her hands together.

 My team was among the throng of people waiting for the right moment to strike. On the signal of a piercing whistle, a green elf leap to the couple and slashed his knife through Rapunzel’s thick, golden braided curls.

“Bah! What a bad case of dandruff you have, dear! Tee-hee!” snickered the mischievous elf and disappeared into a puff of smoke.

 She screamed in horror as her face sagged with wrinkles and she fell on her knees, grasping and scratching her skin. The deed was done.

            
           Of course, by this time, pretty much everyone was hot on our heels for what we have done. The royal guards chased us across the kingdom but we were too fast, too well organized in our plan. At reaching the crowded harbor, I ran into Captain Hook’s ship which immediately took off the water and set sail for the human world. This was my unforgettable escape to a real life where I can truly make myself appreciated by others. 

       Unfortunately, the witches switched sides after being generously bribed by the royal council and they stopped us with their magic. I was parted from my comrades and thrown into this ghastly cell that reeks of sweat and urine. I do not regret for what I did because as anyone with eyes can see, they were for the good of everyone. Everything will return to normal and the endless cycle of happily ever after will repeat itself. 

Next time, when I am out, I shall set things right once and for all. 

I will get out!

    *********************************************************************


I wrote this short story for a monologue assignment in drama class early this year. I like to add a bit of humour in all the stories I write because hey, we all need something to laugh at. Plus, I'm really not so great in the melancholy department because I tend to twist the plot so instead of crying, readers would laugh in the end. I still need loads of practice in this particular field. 

© Copyright by Syazwani Izzati 

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